Sam’s Diary #17

28th April 2008

shutterstock_268127591

Work is still going well and I’m enjoying the challenge. I feel a bit down this evening though, lonely, I guess. I’d like to find Mr Right, but I’m in no hurry. In fact, I do wonder if I have it in me to ever trust a man again.

I’m aching a bit this evening after the latest session of my self-defence class. The class is going well and I’ve a good grasp of the basics. I don’t want to lose my femininity, but I do want the confidence of knowing that I can defend myself. The instructor even asked me to ease up on one of the other pupils because I was ‘too enthusiastic’. Yikes! Little old me showing too much aggression. I suppose I do have a fair amount of anger trapped inside me, due to the beatings received at the hands of Dan and my mother, but I tend to turn that anger on myself and get annoyed with myself if I do things wrong. I’m aware of the problem and trying to make changes, but it’s two steps forward, one step back most of the time.

Listening to a collection of 1960s classics on my CD player now. I love these songs and I’m sure they’ll brighten my mood. California Dreaming. Ah, well…maybe I’ll get there one day…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s